![]() ![]() If someone else believes in the change, they need to make it. Whether you’re a consultant or an in-house employee, never do something you don’t believe in. If The Techie absolutely demands that a certain change be made, he needs to be the one pulling the trigger. Keep dancing away from the gun with that same line, and force The Techie to take his own shots. If that doesn’t work, let me know, but otherwise, it sounds like you’ve got it under control.” Besides, I bet you know how to replace the impeller, right? The Manager would probably rather have you replace the impeller than me, since I’m more expensive than one of Charlie Sheen’s dates. Me: “Me? Well, I can, but I wouldn’t do it under these situations. ![]() ![]() The Technie: “So you’ll replace the impeller for us?” If replacing the impeller fixes the problem here, that’s great.” Me: “Hmmm, well, that hasn’t been my experience, but you know how that goes – the answer to any SQL Server question is that it depends. The Techie: “So you agree with me that the problem is the impeller?” If it turns confrontational, The Consultants Arrive Unfortunately, it doesn’t always go this easily…. You’re just presenting it as an option, and you’re only presenting it because they don’t have the situation under control. At this point, The Techie has admitted out loud that he’s out of options, but you haven’t shoehorned him into saying he’s wrong. You have to smile really big when you say that, and you have to actually be willing to put your reputation on the line with The Manager. If it explodes, hey, now’s your chance to blame the stupid consultant and look like a hero, right?” If it doesn’t work right away, you can put it back. Me: “Let’s try rotating the flux capacitor. The Techie: “No, everything I try isn’t working.” The Techie: “No, we still only make it to 83mph.” Me: “Ouch – replacing the impeller didn’t work?” The Techie: “Ummm – well – it’s not working.” Any consultant can get one gig – to be successful, you have to be invited back, and that’s not gonna happen if the client staff are all walking around with red behinds because you spanked ’em so hard. The Techie really believes in his skills, and you don’t want to pull his pants down in front of his manager. There’s two ways the conversation can go next, but either way, it’s absolutely imperative that you handle the situation with grace. If his answer was right, he would have tried it already, and his manager wouldn’t have brought me in. If he knows what the problem is, and he knows how to fix it, now is his chance to deliver. He’s come to a conclusion that I don’t agree with, and this line is my way of refocusing the conversation back on him. The Techie is trying to corner me into his version of the problem. Me: “So it sounds like you’ve got it under control then.” What That Line Does Call the Consultants I’ve read it in all the books, and I sat in Marty’s session last year when he said rotating the flux capacitor to the right is one of the most common mistakes. Me: “Normally that’s true, but in this particular case – ” It leads to burned-out muffler bearings.” You should never rotate the flux capacitator to the right. That’ll get us the extra power we need to reach 88 miles per hour under load.” Me: “Based on everything I’ve seen so far, it looks like the flux capacitor needs to be rotated to the right. The conversation goes a little something like this: Me – your hero, but in this conversation, imagine the part being played by Brad Pitt, only sexier.He might be a little offended that the company is second-guessing him by bringing in an outsider, and he sees it as an intrusion on his territory. The tips, techniques, and tools he’s used have never done him wrong, but this one problem has him frazzled. The Techie – he’s got years, maybe a decade of experience, and he’s just as frustrated.The Manager – he’s frustrated because the application isn’t performing the way he wants.This particular situation usually pops up in groups. The Situation: Experienced and Frustrated Client I’ve been sharing my Consulting Lines series with you, fellow geek, so you can help manage your end users and managers. Thanks to other consultants and writers, I’ve been able to accumulate a little treasure trove of ways to poke people the same way I poke technology and achieve predictable results. I’ve been consulting part time for years, and the last six months of full-time consulting has been a real eye-opener. That part of consulting is predictable and reliable. I know when I poke SQL Server a certain way, it’s going to respond a certain way. For us geeks, the hardest part about consulting isn’t the technology. ![]()
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